Linky: I’s Got Trump Hair!

I’s named Lincoln. I’s a President. I’s da boss.

I hears there’s a guy named Trump. He’s an alpha. He tells everyones what’s to dos.

I’s bossy too. I figures that having hairs like da Trump will make everyones know to listens to mes. I dids mah hairs dis morning.

You likes? Member, I’s an alpha President. Don’t mess wiff me.

xoxo, Linky

Editor’s note: Linky is not political. He watches too much Saturday Night Live.